Why Underdogs Make Great Embodied Leaders
Casey Berglund: [00:00:00] Hello there and welcome back to the Purpose Map Podcast. I'm Casey Bergland, your host and the founder of Worthy and Dwell, and I'm so delighted that you're here. As always. Today, I wanna share with you why underdogs make fabulous, embodied leaders. It's true, and if you're listening to this, maybe you resonate with that term.
Maybe you don't fully, but you feel like you're someone who thinks outside of the conventional box. You know, when I speak about being an underdog, I think about folks who maybe feel like their upbringing wasn't super entitled. And though you can recognize your privilege and honor that maybe you had to like move through some stuff.
You know, I'm thinking about my journey. As a child being bullied and being someone who didn't really feel like she fit. And [00:01:00] yet I also fit everywhere. It's like I could adjust and mold and shape shift in order to have this sense of almost like a superficial belonging, but it didn't always feel authentic.
And you know, to be honest, now that I'm speaking about it, it's like kind of a trauma response to like, Mold and fit to keep the peace. So that might be you as well. So when I speak about an underdog, I'm talking about someone who feels like maybe they always saw the world in unconventional ways, or didn't always fit the mold of the communities that others seem to belong so easily to maybe.
You're an underdog. If you're someone who has perspectives that are beyond the black and white. You know, maybe you're someone who doesn't seem to fit on one side or the other politically, or in debates or in conversations about right and wrong and good and bad, like likely. [00:02:00] You know, I, I speak a lot about smart, ambitious, spiritually curious people.
Those are the ones that we attract to this community. But I would add into it often. Worthy and well attracts underdogs, for lack of a better word, truly. And we have these gifts of empathy and being able to kind of tune in and see multiple perspectives at once. But that's not always, or it doesn't always feel like that is, you know, the most.
Accepted position to take. You might really sense that you have some intuitive or empathetic gifts to create, like healing opportunities for other people through your underdog ness, but maybe you don't really know exactly how to own that and be empowered by it. This episode we've already dug in this episode is for you.
If you feel [00:03:00] like the person who I described. It's funny, I just returned from. Meeting up with a friend, uh, in Costa Rica before I head back to Calgary. And we've had an interesting journey together where she has reflected some things back to me that I'm like, oh, really? You see that in me? You feel that about me?
Like really silly things like. She, um, has called me stylish and I feel like the word stylish is like not something that I would use to describe myself. In fact, I've always felt a little bit awkward around like clothing and have, I have really stylish friends who've like run fashion companies and such.
And so in comparison or relative to. People who I would consider stylish. I just don't feel that way, and so it's been an interesting experiment for her to reflect back to me how stylish I am and to actually like accept it and embrace it [00:04:00] and own it. That's interesting. Another word that I'm owning that has never felt true of my reality is being cool the word cool because like I said, to me, I feel like I've been an underdog.
I've been someone who didn't quite fit, who was a bit of an outlier in my small community, and who experienced. You know, a feeling of not belonging growing up. So it's super interesting when we explore our own experiences of who we are, and I feel like the folks who are attracted to this community navigate these inner experiences of feeling maybe, sometimes not good enough, maybe having some imposter syndrome, maybe not seeing themselves in the way that others see them.
Like for me, I would never consider myself stylish or cool, but you know. Maybe it's true. Maybe I am stylish and cool. It's just my inner experience of being an underdog that keeps me from seeing that truth. So anyway, [00:05:00] if you're here, you likely resonate with some element of this definition, like. Maybe you dealt with some stuff growing up.
Maybe you had an alcoholic parent or some struggles growing up, or maybe everything seemed to be storybook in your family, like your family was perceived as having everything together and being kind of a perfect family, but for some reason you felt like something was off. This feeling of being an underdog could show up in very different ways and.
If you're here, you likely resonate with that description. You likely feel like you are someone who, like I said earlier, can fit everywhere and nowhere, and maybe like you're a bit of a lone wolf, or you've learned how to find comfort walking alone. Now, here's what I wanna share with you. [00:06:00] Underdogs make incredible embodied leaders.
So if you're here, you're probably also, you have probably a calling toward leadership, your own definition of it, and you're not interested in some toxic, patriarchal power over definition of leadership, but rather a power with your people. You wanna build your own table with and for your life giving community.
so you're in the right spot. I'm so glad that you're. And I wanna share with you at least my experience, but it might be yours too, of what it means to be, to what it means to me to be in a state of disempowerment as an underdog, and the journey that I've taken and I've watched others take and my clients take to become a more empowered underdog.
And how I think that empowered underdogs will change the world, for the better. So, [00:07:00] If you're someone who feels like you have different ideas or like you never quite fit, it can be easy to keep those ideas to yourself. Or maybe like stuff your truth, especially in a culture that guides you to be a certain way, act a certain way, speak a certain way, you know, belong to a certain perspective or idea of community.
If you haven't already done a lot of inner work to detangle your truth from your conditioning, it can feel like you have to. Either show up as someone different from who you really are or keep some things to yourself, like behind closed doors feel a little bit armored. I know for me, for much of my life, I felt like I had to keep a lot to myself.
I felt like I had to keep a lot of my pain to myself. Like I couldn't necessarily show my emotions or express what [00:08:00] was hurting inside, but I also had to keep a lot of my wins to myself. For me, growing up in a small town, being good at things was actually part of what got me bullied, you know, being athletic or being, uh, taking part in like.
Acting gigs and these things that were uncommon for my town made me feel like they were part of what made me not belong. So even if I was excited for something, I had to keep that excitement to myself. Like it wasn't safe for me to like show up fully as me and be in my biggest expression. So in that place of.
In some ways, disempowerment, it's easy to create stories and belief systems that perpetuate this idea that. , you know, you need to go it alone or that nobody will understand, or that your situation is so different from someone else's because you think so differently. I see this time and time again. I, I know it within myself, but I've seen it in clients [00:09:00] too, where I hear them speak about something that makes them feel like they don't belong and then they have a whole story around it that kind of like deepens the energy of not belong.
And when I hear it, I'm like, oh, interesting, interesting how you're saying this. And also this other client feels the same way. I've felt the same way. And suddenly you realize like, is this actually unique to your experience or is this actually a shared experience? Part of what it means to be human and to have emotions is to feel sometimes like an underdog, like you don't quite fit or like you're maybe different from others.
Maybe you can relate. So often I find when there is a swallowing of my truth or a hiding of my truth, or a hmm, pushing down of my truth, I don't realize it in the moment, but , [00:10:00] this is happened enough times in my past that I can experience it as. Constriction in my body, my body starts to feel that stuffing.
There can be a, a tightening in my chest or a tenderness in my throat, or tears behind my eyes, like some sort of like anger, sadness, resentment, fear is all swirling together so vividly that it just kind of can keep me stuck. It certainly doesn't allow me to pull out my unique ideas that make me different and share them with the world as if they're great gifts.
Right? When I'm disempowered as an underdog, I feel stopped in my tracks. I can often feel torn, like I have a perspective, but it doesn't seem to fit with the common perspective, and so sometimes it makes me question myself or gaslight myself. Have you felt that before where it's like, wait, am I the only one that's seeing it this way?[00:11:00]
Maybe you can relate someone in our community referred to this sort of tension or pain as a integrity pain, or I guess more accurately it would be an out of integrity pain. So the pain that comes from. A battle between the heart and the mind, or a feeling of not aligning with what's true inside, but not knowing what the other option is.
This type of pain can arise when holding onto something out of fear. Maybe that's a job, a relationship, a belief system, a story of un belonging. Basically, this experience of knowing that something deep down is, is wrong. Not exactly knowing what to do about it or if it's safe to express it, but it feels like something doesn't align.
You know? Have you ever been in a job that pays [00:12:00] well and is fine, or it's good most of the time, but getting up in the morning and going to work? Literally creates physical symptoms like your body's telling you, no, I don't want this. And yet you rationalize going. That's kind of an example of this too.
This pain can bubble up and can be triggered by little things, you know, decisions others make or are suggesting, um, situations that you feel pushed into or pulled into that don't fully align with your truth because your truth is different from. What others' truths are. This pain can be triggered by words used that make you feel small and unimpactful, even if you're not exactly conscious of it in the moment.
And then, you know, as underdogs, we can sometimes in a disempowered state convince ourselves that [00:13:00] like we're okay and that the other person is right or that like we should just be more like. You know that maybe it's okay to not feel excited and joyful about life and work and purpose when that pain is pushed down and when the disempowered underdog refuses to pull out their truth regardless of what other people think.
It can fester. You know, and that same pain can bubble up. You know, a day later, a week later, a month later, a year later, over and over again, it's like it doesn't really go away. Not listening to your inner truth or being misaligned or out of integrity can create a pain that persists, if not worsens. , you know, and then sometimes I find I witness and [00:14:00] others, and I've experienced in myself being pretty knocked on my ass , or watching others be knocked on their ass.
It's like not listening to the truth inside can lead to something even bigger. It's like the universe is trying to get your attention and we get knocked on our as. So pushing down pain and sacrificing our truths, especially if we've experienced life as an underdog, is literally can create disease in the body, and it can move us further and further away from ourselves and our truth, to the point where we really lose who we are.
We lose our sparkle. We don't even know what we're here for. , and sometimes by the time that brig big sort of like awakening happens, or we get knocked on our ass so hard, it's like it can be [00:15:00] hard to even discover what needs to be done instead. So what is this about? Like why do you think we put up with this pain?
Why does it feel sometimes that the disempowered underdog, that the only option is to conform? Why do we ignore our truth until it debilitates us? Well, in some ways, our nervous systems. Want us to feel safe. I mean, our nervous systems definitely want us to feel safe, but sometimes the belonging that comes from trying to conform to other people's belief systems or ideas becomes more important than us following our own truth.
Following our own truth can feel too risky. As an underdog, the pain of changing outweighs. The pain of staying the same, and [00:16:00] so we stay the same. Fear keeps us small and we continue to ignore or ch our truth, or at least not act in alignment with it. And it makes perfect sense because like we all need human connection.
We wanna belong, we all need you. Many basic needs. We need money to feed ourselves and our children. So sometimes we stay in a job that takes everything we've got, even if it's not aligned. We feel like we need partnership and love, and so we stay in relationships even when they feel restrictive and toxic.
We need, you know, balance or harmony or to not feel so burnt out. So we buy into marketing messages that promise a quick fix to those problems. You know, it's hard to sometimes honor the truth inside, especially when that [00:17:00] feels risky, especially when it feels like safety is at stake or losing. Belonging is at stake.
The fears can be so p. You know, if I leave my job, I'll never make enough money to feed and care for my children. If I speak up in that meeting, I'll get fired. If I leave my partner, I'll never find someone who loves me again. If I don't diet and work out every day, I will never be healthy. If I stop doing work that, you know, drains my energy, will there even be work that lights me up in the future?
So it makes perfect sense. Sometimes we lie to ourselves, especially as underdogs. When we're disempowered, we rationalize staying where we are. But is it worth it?[00:18:00]
Is it worth it?
How do you start to move forward? What is the journey toward becoming an empowered underdog? Again, I believe that this journey toward becoming empowered, especially as an underdog, creates incredible embodied leaders. I actually think we need more empowered underdogs in leadership positions. Do you know why?
I'll tell you why. I believe that we all feel this way to a certain. Even if we don't admit it, at least if you're listening to this episode, you've probably felt this way before, but what if instead of seeing how you're different as something that [00:19:00] would lead to a lack of belonging? What if you saw it as a gift?
Your differences, your difference, your, your unique perspective, your unique way of being? What if you saw that as a gift that could actually create more belonging in the world? I genuinely believe that empowered underdogs, in other words, people who have been through some shit and have gone through a healing process, who are now owning their truth and owning their power, and standing up for themselves and being different in the world, I believe that people who are empowered in that way model that it's safe to do.
And help others create safety in their nervous systems, that they too can be themselves, that they too can be authentic. I also think that when we go through some stuff that's hard and when we feel like we're an underdog, we develop a sense of compassion and empathy that helps us in [00:20:00] creating more kindness toward other people.
So in a leadership capacity, if you have a sense of what it feels like to not belong or to think outside the box, you're probably more sensitive to creating belonging or inviting more innovative ideas as a leader, and again, if you're empowered, likely. You're really not here for, again, that toxic, patriarchal power over sort of leadership structure.
You're here to create, uh, a place where connection and intimacy and vulnerability and empathy are celebrated when you go through the process of owning what makes you different, your belief systems that are different, owning your truth inside owning. And making changes when you feel misaligned. That [00:21:00] empowerment that comes from those brave choices inspires others.
Not to mention probably creates a level of happiness and contentment that is contagious. If swallowing our truths as disempowered, underdogs, makes us feel small and shrink, we're spreading that smallness with others around us. We're probably not, um, in our joy to the extent that we could be, but when the opposite is true, when you're owning who you are and you feel like you're standing up for yourself and you're connected in with your truth, and you stand for that truth.
In my experience anyway, that inner alignment, being in integrity is the best feeling I could ever experience. And when I feel that I feel so empowered that my energy expands, it's like life starts to flow for me rather than against me. And what [00:22:00] I typically realize is the thing that I thought would make me not belong eventually with the right group of people around me is the exact thing that is a great gift and is celebrated among others.
My community is strengthened when I own my underdog ness, when I own who I am, and I own my pathway, and I am empowered. And I share my gifts with the world. I actually create a stronger sense of belonging and community because it's authentic, it's genuine. We don't have to continue to live in fear. It's okay.
And it's possible to find safe spaces and safe communities where that deep truth can come out. Where what makes you different or what you felt made you an outlier is actually celebrated. I personally, , I am like weird and quirky and do [00:23:00] things that most other people don't, and I love that about myself.
And because I own it now, I attract more people into my life who are also weird and quirky and I don't know, hilarious. They're my people. And so, We all have our people, and I guess I'm calling you forth as an underdog to be part of this community because we love you, we love your gifts, we love what makes you different.
We love your quirks. We wanna celebrate your quirks. , I don't want to, you know, I'm thinking about the Let Your Body Lead Facilitator Training. Yes, it's a training to teach you skills and tools from the Let Your Body Lead Method. But the point of it is not to create a bunch of cookie cutter facilitators.
It's to equip you with potent skills and tools so that you can be more of yourself, more of your quirky, badass, gifted. when we can coexist with our [00:24:00] diversity. I believe that we make the world a better place when we are leaders, embodied leaders who know how to hold space for difference. We allow there to be more innovation and excitement and creativity on our teams and in the people that we work with.
So I think that that is a great gift. I believe that if you're an underdog, it's time to become an empowered one. It's time to release any experiences of being a victim and to transmute those experiences, to alchemize them into experiences that make you feel powerful and connected. If you're here, You want to expand, you wanna learn.
You wanna [00:25:00] apply what you learned to yourself, and also share those learnings with others. If you're here, you're already a leader of sorts. You're already here to impact others. You're already here to become a transformational guide. . And if you wanna do that work alongside other positive. And you know, like-minded practitioners, I say like-minded, but also like differently minded practitioners.
Even if you're a bit uncomfortable with making new friends, then like it's no problem. We've got you. We get that bonds build over time and especially if you're someone who has some experiences of being fearful of not belonging. It's okay. All of you is welcome here. We create containers that are built around unconditional love so that you can bring your whole self to the table and give yourself time for your nervous system to feel safe in our programs and offerings, [00:26:00] including the Let Your Buddy Lead Facilitator Training, we co-create our spaces together in a trauma-informed way so that you feel excited to connect with and support other people.
On their journey. If you're pumped at the idea of elevating the consciousness of the world and creating more acceptance, compassion, and love in the world through being an empowered underdog, you're in the right place, and especially if you'd like to reconnect with the infinite wisdom of your body. And use that infinite wisdom to share your unique gifts with the world.
Then maybe you'd consider joining us for the Let Your Body Lead Facilitator Training. We believe that you're here for a reason, and I invite you to take one step. One step, whatever that means for you. One step into owning your underdog ness, into owning what makes you different, [00:27:00] and maybe even owning what makes you different in community, with others, in community, with others, we can raise the collective consciousness faster.
If you're someone who is curious about finding a place where you belong, even. And especially because of your differences, then you're welcome here. The doors for the Let Your Body Lead Facilitator Training close on March 31st. So that's coming up. And if you're someone who really wants to fully embody your amazing, incredible integrated self and fully express your next level purpose.
Facilitate epic results for your life, giving clients, colleagues, community members, and also learn how to create a core transformational offer to have an impact that [00:28:00] you can get paid for without burning out or neglecting your body's wisdom. That's what they'll let your body lead Facilitator training is here for.
If you have any questions at all, please feel welcome to email info worthy and well.com or dms on Instagram at worthy and well. We're so here for you. And if nothing else, I hope that you take away that you get to be empowered as an underdog and people just like you become incredible, amazing embodied leaders, ones that the world needs.
I can't wait to connect with you soon. Take really good care. Bye-bye.